


You self-destruct and I (won't) watch

by thesoundofnat



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Getting Together, M/M, Overworking, Pre-Slash, Sleep Deprivation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 21:51:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17733332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesoundofnat/pseuds/thesoundofnat
Summary: “We don’t need to discuss my wellbeing.”“Sure, because doctors are obviously immortal.”“I’m busy. I’ve been busy.”(Or, Bones gets carried away with his work and Jim has to help him take care of himself.)





	You self-destruct and I (won't) watch

**Author's Note:**

> An anon prompted: Hi! I was wondering if you could do a fic with Bones getting carried away with his work and not sleeping and Jim has to help him since it’s usually Bones helping him? Thank you!
> 
> Only took me half a year to get to this lmao. I hope you like it!

Jim found Bones hunched over some files at his desk in the medbay. Not looking up when he entered. Mumbling to himself in a way that Jim knew wasn’t a greeting.

“You good?”

He glanced at him, nodded once. “Just peachy.”

“No offense, but you look like crap.”

“We can’t all be pretty like you.”

Jim snorted. “You sweet talker. I mean-” He rounded the desk to get a better look at him. “You look _exhausted_. When was the last time you slept?”

“We don’t need to discuss my wellbeing.”

“Sure, because doctors are obviously immortal.”

“I’m busy. I’ve been busy.”

“I don’t doubt that.” Jim reached out to touch his cheek, if only to get him to look at him again. “But you always go on and on about me needing to take care of myself, too. Why’s it any different for you?”

Bones leaned back in his chair. “I’m needed.”

“I’m sure you didn’t mean to offend my position.”

Bones rolled his eyes. “You know I didn’t.”

“Oh, good.”

“I just- I have to finish this. And people keep getting sick or hurt. And I need to keep doing check ups. I can’t just _leave_ them.”

“We have more people working here, you know. You can actually go sleep for a few hours.”

Bones shook his head. “No.”

“Bones.”

“No time.”

“Come on now. Don’t make me order you.”

He didn’t reply. Only hunched back over his desk.

Jim sighed. “I have a meeting. If I find you here still when I come back I’ll kick your ass.”

Bones waved a hand at him. “Yeah, yeah, see you at dinner.”

Jim stared at him for a few more seconds, his friend not returning his gaze, and left. He had a feeling he’d spend a lot of time in here the next coming week.

* * *

 

Jim crept through the hallways, the lights dimmed due to most of the crew being asleep. He wouldn’t really mind crawling into his bed himself, but Bones hadn’t arrived to eat and Jim had had enough of his overworking ass. Barging into medbay all dramatically was higher on his agenda than sleep right now.

“Bones, for _heaven’s_ sake- oh.”

Bones was still at his desk, his head resting on the surface next to his pad, asleep. It seemed highly uncomfortable, and Jim knew after way too many all nighters at the Academy that his neck would kill him if he remained like that. Taking a hesitant step closer, Jim weighed his options. Leave him be and let him rest and be in pain, or wake him and lead him to his quarters to sleep in a real bed and risk him not going with him.

Dammit Bones, you couldn’t have gone to bed yourself?

He grabbed the pad, careful not to wake his friend just yet, and put it into the drawer where Bones tended to keep it. Grabbed the pen and put it in its place. Straightened the framed picture he kept of his daughter. Wiped some dust off of the very edge of the desk, and by the time he was finished Bones was blinking at him.

“Oh.”

“What are you doing?”

“Cleaning.”

“Why?”

“Helping you keep your hours down.”

“Oh, ha ha.” He straightened, wincing as he did. “Jesus.”

“Thought so. You need a real bed. A bed with memory foam. Come on.”

“But-”

“Bones, you literally fell asleep during the two hours I left you alone. I think that’s enough of a sign.”

Bones allowed himself to get pulled to his feet. Let Jim put his arm around him. “I’m still going to work tomorrow.”

“As long as you sleep more than five hours I’m happy.”

The walk was excruciatingly slow, but Jim wasn’t in any rush. Bones seemed half asleep still, and he wasn’t gonna be the one to fully wake him. He realized this wasn’t the first time he’d had to help his friend put his own needs first. Maybe they needed to talk.

Tomorrow. Jim needed to take care of him first. God knew no one else would.

* * *

 

“Thanks.”

“For?”

“For putting me to bed yesterday.”

Jim barked out a laugh. “It’s my pleasure. Literally.”

“Maybe I don’t really-” Bones paused, fingers on his coffee cup. “Maybe I don’t prioritize my wellbeing as much as I should.”

“I’m glad you’re finally realizing it.”

“I figure I’ve been a bit of a hypocrite.”

“Stop it. As long as you don’t make a habit out of it, it’s fine.”

Bones exhaled through his nose. Jim put his fork down.

“Do we need to talk about it? Like, why you’ve suddenly gone on this- spiral? Why you’re spiraling.”

“I’m not spiraling.”

“You’re very obviously spiraling. What’s going on?”

Bones didn’t say anything. Lifted his cup to his lips. Took a sip. Jim was patient. So very patient. Didn’t break eye contact even as Bones went back to his eggs. He could take his time. Jim wasn’t in any hurry.

“Stop looking at me,” Bones finally said. “It’s creepy.”

“So answer my question.”

“Not here, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I can’t just- just not here.”

“All right.”

Jim picked up his fork. Took a bite. Both silent in the loud cafeteria. Always in their own little world when they were together, or so they had been told.

He touched Bones’ ankle with his foot, and when Bones relaxed he knew it would be okay.

* * *

 

“So,” Jim said, the two of them full and more awake and hidden from everyone in Bones’ quarters. “Talk.”

Bones crossed his arms, mouth opening and closing and opening again. “It’s just- everything that’s happened recently has messed me up.”

“Elaborate.”

“You dying, for starters.”

“Ah.” Jim felt a painful jab somewhere in his chest. So it was his fault.

“And just being in space in general. I miss Joanna.”

“I’m sure you’ll get to see her soon.”

“Everyone keeps hurting and dying and I just- I can’t help them all, Jim.”

“You’re doing your best.”

“I need to do _more_.”

_"Bones_. Stop.”

Bones shut his mouth. Jim leaned closer, fingers itching to do _something_ to help.

“It’s okay.”

“It isn’t.”

“Bones. It’s okay.”

They fell onto the couch, sides and arms and legs touching, but neither of them saying a word. Jim took Bones’ hand in his own, no preamble or hesitation or fear, despite the slight drop of his stomach when Bones didn’t immediately react. A squeeze to his hand calmed him, but he realized he wasn’t the one that was supposed to get comforted.

“What did you tell me when I first became captain?”

Bones shifted, head turning toward him. “Uh, are you out of your mind?”

“After that.”

“I think I congratulated you.”

“And then?”

Bones sighed. “What?”

“You told me to always do my best no matter what.”

“I can sense where this is going.”

“You can’t do more than your best, Bones. You can’t work yourself to death.”

“I’ll try. For you. But I want you to keep it in mind as well.”

“For you.”

“If you want to.”

“I’d do anything for you, Bones.”

“Even drop that stupid nickname?”

“Not _quite_ anything then.”

Bones let out a laugh. “Knew it.”

Jim leaned in and Bones met him halfway.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [tumblr](http://thesoundofnat.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
